I say this with zero shame and a total lack of self-respect: There was no way that I was going to live my life without ever picking up this book. C’mon, how could I not?? I’m a millennial woman. I read the books. I watched the movies. I chose a side. (Team Edward, duh.) As soon as Stephenie Meyer announced Midnight Sun was actually going to happen, my dormant high-schooler soul awoke with a sudden desire for teenage angst and unrealistic (more, like unhealthy) romance. Here was my chance to enter the mind of the hottest fictional character that ever (technically, not) lived…and I loved every goddamn second of it.

Seriously? You loved it?

Hell yeah. And, shockingly, I dove in expecting to enjoy it. Trust me, I know how unpopular of an opinion this is, and I won’t attempt to change anyone’s minds. The book is garbage, we all know that. But so was Twilight, and look what WE did—made it one of the most dominant book series and movie franchises ever. So don’t come at me. We’re all guilty!

Just in case you live under a rock, Midnight Sun is basically Twilight from Edward’s perspective. Same beginning, same middle, same end. But instead of listening to a whiny and fragile Bella, we get a pale, creepy, 100-year-old stalker.

“Team Edward,” huh?

I’m so conflicted. How do you love and hate a character at the same time? Let’s be real, Edward is a toxic mess. I didn’t realize just how badly he fucks with Bella’s emotions until getting a front-row seat to his thoughts. The guy is scarily manipulative and that asshole knew exactly how much he was playing with her emotions.

On the other, trashier hand, this was my first re-read after the movies were released, which means my imagination went buck wild having Robert fucking Pattinson as a reference point. Whether you’re single or in a relationship, living in Edward’s head for 800+ pages is pure torture. The way he looks at Bella is how you pray your partner is looking at you. If you’re single, you won’t want to be. If you’re married, you won’t want to be. That’s it. We’re all ruined.

That’s depressing…?

Sorry, I’ll move on. Let’s talk about the Cullens. Since Edward can hear everyone’s thoughts, we learn a lot more about his vampire family in this one. I loved getting to know them from this angle. There was nothing new to learn, per se, but everything was elevated. I “saw” Alice’s visions and how many futures she was able to see at once. I was able to understand Jasper’s struggles with being a “vegetarian” a little bit more. And Rosalie…well, she wasn’t a picnic the first time around and her anger multiplies two-fold.

Is there anything new about this story?

As I said, it’s literally the same plotline. Except now we see what goes on when Bella and Edward aren’t together. How did he find Bella before she got attacked by that group of guys in town? What did he do to distract himself when trying to stay away from her? How did he NOT catch James before he got to Arizona?? Surprisingly, there’s also a ton of backstory to Edward and Carlisle’s relationship that was hardly explored in Twilight. This was an interesting, but longwinded, break from Edward’s constant pining for Bella. Plus, it was nice to know what Edward was thinking when he was stalking Bella night after night. His actions were creepy, but somehow his intentions didn’t seem that way.

I’m on the fence.

I won’t recommend this to anyone anytime soon. But if you want to read it, this girl ain’t judging.

Too lazy to check Goodreads? I got you:

Title: Midnight Sun
Author: Stephanie Meyer
Series: The Twilight Saga #5
Pages: 675 (ebook)
Publish Date: August 4, 2020

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